Struggled chapter 3 part two

Then I would become good friends with a cancer surviving, youth pastoring, bald man, who took me golfing.

I loved golfing.

Or trying to golf. One way or another or several. But, the pastor had a weird streak and perhaps jealous or something. Soon, Youth Pastor “b” would be ousted and Pastor would assert with aggressive authority his leadership on our little 7 person youth group.

Life went out the church door about that time.

I was pissed. I was saddened, let down, disappointed, unsure, unsteady and confused to a major degree. Vulnerable and vexed. Fished and flushed. I was lost and limboed.

Later, I would wind up sharing a basement during a flood with that friend I stood up for. That is, till I went my way and he went to drugs. Not the “good” drugs that I agreed with either. The hard and the heavy and the stronger than man drugs. For reference sake alone, before I started smoking pot, I instructed myself what was allowed. Marijuana, opium, shrooms and peyote. Never did get the last two. Don’t know why opium was on the list, but it was and I did it. I thought it was God’s gift at the time. It was boring for me though, so I never attempted it a second time. Or, maybe it was the fact that the one night I had opium, I also had tequila, the worm and several bong rips through a gas mask?! Maybe, that affected me. The end result: peeing myself in public and not even giving a rat’s tookus.

You ever been so high you fell off the floor? Then had nasty nightmares about it? Yeah, me too.

You ever done something so stupid as to be cajoled into using a five foot vacuum hose sealed off around a three foot bong and a gas mask made from Israel? It is interesting to say the least. Thought I was going to wind up dead from coughing on that one.

The other pot induced moment that really sticks out to me like a dog eared, fuzzy dream book of memories, is, passing a bong on the interstate. 72 m.p.h. and getting to within arms reach of another car is kind of scary. Actually, as the driver, it would have been really scary, had I not been high at the time.

So, stupidity and drugs go hand in hand quite often. Or, they did in my case. I never did enjoy the lifestyle though. The whole jonesing thing philosophy. I didn’t want to wake up wanting something and spend an entire day trying to get some. I’m married now and I jones a little differently! It’s weird how I correlated that learned habitual behavior to chase and woo my wife now, but that is how it became useful in my non drug days.

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2 thoughts on “Struggled chapter 3 part two

  1. I once had a patient who, in his drug-induced state, thought that he could fly so he jumped off a roof. Needless to say, when I got him in rehab, he was a double amputee. I’m glad you managed to leave that lifestyle behind. I think it’s very Christian to pray for the ones who struggle with addiction since it’s very difficult to overcome the illness.

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